It was three days before my due date and another C-section but I was more than ready to meet my baby.
The last four weeks of my pregnancy were riddled with more discomfort, pain and contractions than I ever remember with Caroline. I even spent the night in labor and delivery one night because we thought it was the real thing. Sadly, I had another repeat of Caroline's false alarms :) And, after all I would go through my body wouldn't go anywhere outside of 1 cm and 50%. So much for making progress.
The Monday before Mark was born I had a klutsy moment and fell down the stairs. Yes, one minute I am standing there in my stocking feet and the next I am slipping downward doing the splits and whacking my head on the banister on the way down. After four hours of observation in L&D the baby was found to be fine and staying put. Whew.
Thursday I had my last doctor's appointment. He checked me and again I was at a 1. Mark was so high he couldn't even strip my membranes to try and help me along. I had done a lot of praying and thinking and had made a very touhg decision. My doctor told me I could wait until Tuesday when he would check me again and if there was no change then that he would do the surgery to get him out. I had waitied so long, been having strong contractions, I was so tired of all the special appointments and tests, I was exhausted and had done everything I could at this point. Four weeks hadn't done anything for my body I didn't think four days would make any difference. I asked him to move forward with the C-section and gave up on the idea of a VBAC. It was heartbreaking to do but I had reached the end of the race and if I was going to have a C-section anyways on Tuesday I wasn't going to spend anymore time in pain. I got a call the next morning that I would be going in at noon and my surgery was scheduled for 2. I felt so good about it at that point.
We left Caroline with my dad and Brad, me and my mom all headed to the hospital. We were met there by my amazing doula, Helen and they all helped me stay calm and wait and prepare.
Finally my time had come and I was so scared and nervous. I walked to the OR and Brad waited outside while they got my spinal done. The doctor on call was GREAT. She walked in and took my hand, put my head on her shoulder and held my back still during the whole spinal process. It was HORRIBLE. I decided in those few moments that a planned C-section was worse than the unplanned. I hated feeling heavy and tingly all over. I felt like I had a pain in my back that I couldn't move away from or change positions. I was so nauseated and I honestly thought to myself: that's it, you idiot. You just slammed the door on anymore children. I am never go to do through this again. And, I began to cry. Brad was at my side by then and kept telling me how amazing I was doing and how much he loved me. The nurses told me I could have medicine for the discomfort and nausea as soon as the baby was out. I coulnd't wait.
The doctor began telling me what was going on. I had quite a bit of scar tissue which slowed the process and she ended up removing a lot of it. I felt the tugging and all of a sudden I heard. "I have the head. That's a BIG head. Honey, this would have been one ugly vaginal birth!!" I finally laughed. After more pulling the doctor said: "here it is. This is a big baby. It's a big baby......BOY! At that point I was so stunned it wasn't a girl that I began screameing "oh my God! Oh my God! I was wrong, I was WRONG!" Everyone laughed at me. I was thrilled to have my boy. They then told me again I could have the medicine now. I realized I didn't need it. As soon as he was out my adrenaline hit the roof and took over. I needed nothing but him. I couldn't even cry for ten minutes I was so high on emotion.
I sent Brad over to him while they finished me up. I remember asking him: does he look ok? Brad turned and said "yeah". I made him lock eyes with me as I tearfully said: NO, does he look OK?? I couldn't bring myself to say the words butBrad understood and assured me our baby was healthy! No chromosomal problems of any kind and everything else was perfect too and we headed to recovery after a bit of snuggling with mom and dad. I again had a larger child whose sugar levels needed to be stabilized so he got a small bottle until I was ready. Again I was feeling crappy from the spinal and morphine and not being able to sit up or move at all.
I assured Brad the two of us would be ok while we worked on nursing and he left to share the news. My dad had brought my sister and Caroline to the hospital at that point so they were there now with mom and Helen and they were all waiting. I was off in recovery a good two hallways/corridors away. I was nursing Mark and my nurses were working on finishing all the paperwork from the surgery. I heard this noise and one of the nurses said "your husband must have just told your family". My family was THAT NOISE I heard!! They all screamed so loud when they found out it was boy that we heard them down in the recovery room! They all came in to meet the little guy and the fun really began. Brad brought Caroline in and she instantly fell in love. She adores her baby brother and is constantly loving on him in some way.
Christmas was wonderful and surely one I will never forget. We started the year off in a special way by having him baptized on New Year's Eve and it was a wonderful night :) We baptized him at the church where my mom works. The pastor is a good friend of our family now and was so happy to do it for us. He did it during mass and it was beautiful. He is actually the priest who married us and Mark's Godparents are actually our best man and maid of honor so I think that made it even more special too!
So far he is doing well health and weight wise. He is a very gassy and spitty baby and we are working on that. I want to pull my hair out at some times but I know it will be worth it in the end. I am currently off of dairy products and some other stuff to see if that helps the situation and we have a re-check of the situation this week with the pedi. I pray it goes well.
Other than that we discover each day something else new and wonderful about having two children and we are all adapting well. I can't wait to see my two babies together this summer and all the summers to come! Maybe another planned C-section or two wouldn't be a bad thing after all....many years from now of course!
Mark Thomas Borek
December 16, 2011 2:45 pm
8 lbs. 14 ounces 21 1/2 inches
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